Today was a very long and hard day for me. There was a lot of emotion I've been pushing down for sometime and today it all came up. This is something I would never tell a soul, but I'm starting a new chapter in my life. In my short 26 years I've been through a lot of sadness, stress and drama, but besides that all I've been a very happy go lucky person. A person who works fast and hard, give others what they want, makes other laugh and goes above and beyond. I like this about me, but today it was all to much!
I think as women we all have are moments where we can't keep pushing down our issues and this day was mine. My dad was put into the hospital, I got into a fight with Jason, we missed church because I'm too chubby and couldn't find anything to wear and our house was a mess. These 4 things were all to much for me to handle in one day!
As I sat in the bath room crying and getting it all out I heard my (sweet and wise beyond his years) son (who is 5) Singing " I feel my Saviors love" (a song I didn't know he knew all the words to). This touched my soul and gave me more than hope.
So here is my promise to myself
- I will stop pushing down feelings and confront the issue (if there is one)!
- I will stop seeking for approval for the small things... that JUST DON'T MATTER!
- I will stop and take a moment to breath
- I will not feel bad if I need to cry it out (because crying can be beautiful)
Life is so short and I want to live EVERY SECOND OF IT HAPPY! For some of you this might be to much info, but at 12:48 am and me sitting here with my thoughts alone... I thought "I'm sure I'm not the only one out there who had a bad day, on Sunday". Thanks for letting me get this out.
~H
6 comments:
Having a bad day is not a bad thing. I know how you feel though; I've always been one to hide my feeling and sometimes they just explode. I hope that you are feeling better, I know that there are a ton of people that love you! Your a great friend!
no, you're not the only one. I'm glad you were able to hear the song your son was singing and that it made a difference. Sometime's it's hard to let go of all the little things that don't matter, but it's true that they really don't. Wishing you a happier day!
Holly
hogwildaboutstamping.blogspot.com
Seriously, catching my breath is one of the hardest things to do (and can cometimes take days or weeks), I hope you have a better day, if not, I always remember that chocolate will love me no matter what!
oh my dear friend, I'm so sad that you were having such a day yesterday! You know that Bradley singing that song is Heavenly Father's way of showing you that you ARE LOVED!!! You are such a cheerful person and I didn't even realize you had so much bottled in.
Hope you're feeling better today and don't forget I'm only a phone call away. Take care. :)
How sweet that your son was the angel sent at the right time for you to hear when life became overwhelming.
just ran across your blog and love this post. i have cried before church many times cuz nothing fits. just glad to know that someone else does this. great layouts love your work.
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